A Most Incredible Thing

I saw an incredible thing today!
An amazing, improbable thing today!
A stupendous and wondrous
Tremendous and marvelous
Most incredible thing!

This thing that I witnessed today,
Was such a fantastic display!
I was struck with delight
At the extraordinary site
Of this most incredible thing!

The Nap

Under the shade of a maple tree
Sleeps a tiny, little snoring flea
Bedded down in the hair of a worn-out rat
That's sleeping soundly on the back of a fluffy brown cat
That's curled up tight on an old hound dog
That's snoozing on the back of a fat, pink hog
That's catching forty winks on the back of a cow
That's also asleep, though I don't know how
And under that cow sleeps an old gray mare
And can you guess what's under there?
Why, another little flea, at the bottom of the pile...
And I think it's going to be asleep for awhile.

The Rainbow's End

Pack your travel bags, and come with me
We'll voyage across a purple sea
Under a golden yellow sun
To a colorful world far away.

We'll come ashore on fiery opal sands
Then push onward into a painted land
Of crimson and jade and sapphire hues
Brushed on by an artist unknown.

So come with me, my dearest friend
Together we'll find the rainbow's end
We'll toss our troubles to the wind
And we'll leave this world behind.

Deal With the Devil

An old cowboy rode into town
On a worn out horse with his head held down.
Stepped into a tavern
On a dusty, windswept,

Unforgiven street.

One last chance was all he had
'Cause things had really turned out bad.
And he sat down at a table

Dealing endless hands of stud.

That night, a cowboy came for blood.

Across the table, bathed in red
Sat the Devil, horns upon his head
A stack of chips
And a wicked, rotten smile.

The Devil looked like he'd been there awhile.

Confident the cowboy

Slid his chips into the pot.
Looked at his cards

And he felt his face grow hot.
But times were tough and he'd had enough
He bet his soul, and Red called his bluff.
And when the cards fell
The Devil laughed

And swished his pointy tail.

Can't take it back, once you go all in.
Sometimes there's just no way a man can win.

The Devil lit a fat cigar
He laid the contract on the bar.
And Old Scratch let out a chuckle
Through a toothy yellow grin.
And then

The cowboy looked him square in the eye
And he signed his name with a tired sigh.
He had no choice
And now his fate was sealed.

Someday the Devil would collect his due.
But what else could a beaten cowboy do?

Funhouse Mirror

Gaze into the funhouse mirror

Destiny was never clearer

Shrinks the legs and tugs the heart

Watch it spread your eyes apart

Gilded Bird

Gilded bird, polished bright
Emerald eyes blind to the light.

Prized parrot in cage nearby
Has a voice but cannot fly.

Small brown bird sits in a tree
Worth so little yet so free.

Forbidden Fruit

Once there was an antelope

Who fell for a young cantaloupe

Against their parents' wishes

They eloped

And ran away*

*Well, one ran. The other rolled.

Sweet Dreams

She laid her pretty little head
Down on her pretty little bed
She shut her pretty eyes as daddy said "sweet dreams"

She found a land of lollipops
Skipped down a path of sweet gumdrops
She crossed a bridge above a gushing chocolate stream

She strayed so very far from home
A little girl all alone
Lured by things that weren't exactly as they seemed

Entered an endless saccharin maze
That turned a hundred different ways
Cut through a thicket unlike any she had seen

And so enchanted by the scent
Of winding vines of peppermint
Continued on to see what waited 'round the bend

She tasted of forbidden sweets
An endless feast of truffle treats
That left a smear of chocolate fudge across her chin

And as the hour was growing late
From candy apple trees she ate
Crunched sweet and juicy bites of red delicious sin

But then a breeze began to blow
And powdered sugar fell like snow
And her indulgent romp came to a sour end

The path grew dark, the vines closed in
The candied thorns tore at her skin
For she had savored far too much of a good thing

And when she caught the sickly smell
Of sticky burning caramel

She felt a frantic panic quickly setting in

Her feet left gooey taffy tracks
But she could not find the way back
She was as scared as any girl had ever been

Lost in a wicked candy land
She finally came to understand
The rancid side of life that woke her with a scream

And though still safe within her bed
Sweet visions danced inside her head
The pretty girl's too scared to go to sleep again

He Wears a Mask

Concealed and exposed
Walks through a world
That no one knows
He wears a mask
Tied 'round him for eternity

A blessing and a curse
Defines the best
Reveals the worst
Becomes the only him
That he's allowed to be

Love on the High Seas

Although cuttlefish are lovely
They're the furthest thing from cuddly
And I find kissing fish extremely hard to court.

Sadly, the creatures of the sea
Remain a mystery to me
And so I think it's time that I sail back to port.

Lion Tamer

On a train I met a stranger
Claimed he was a lion tamer
Found out later he was just a lyin' liar.

The Uninteresting Life of a Tree

Of all the things that I could be
I'm really glad I'm not a tree
'Cause if I was I think I wood be rather board.